May 10, 2007

Hey everyone! Just dropping in to say hello. Not too much has happened (what else is new...lol)!! Work has been absolutely crazy and I've been working very long hours. I did, however, manage to throw a great surprise anniversary party for my parents in March. Their anniversary was February 20th, but I waited until March to throw them off. They were so surprised. Friends and family joined us for a great party with a deejay, great food, and of course lots of alcohol :)-! It was a lot of fun.

I went to Georgia to visit Shanon, Mike, and the kids for my birthday. I spent a great week with them. I love Georgia...such a beautiful place to live. The towns there have festivals all the time. It seems like such a great place to raise a family. Though I miss Shan, Mike and the kids very much, I am very happy for them because I do think they will have a better life there...maybe one day I'll be able to join them there and start fresh!

I think about that a lot...moving and starting over in a new place, getting a fresh start. It has nothing do with not liking where I am now but I think it would be a wonderful thing to build a new life from scratch for myself, entirely my own...if that makes any sense at all. Who knows, maybe it will happen one day.

It's been a long time...

Since I've posted in this blog. Over a year actually and its my birthday again! I'm going to be 28 years old. It was not the greatest year. Both of my grandmother's passed away. My brother's been sick on and off. My best friend moved to Georgia leaving me here all by my lonesome :( but I do visit her as often as I can. Aside from that, there hasn't been too many other eventful occurrences. Here's hoping this next year is filled with much joy and laughter!

YAY!!!

Just booked an awesome party bus to take us all down to A.C.!!! What a way to start the celebration! WOO HOO!

My Birthday Celebration - Part 2

Well, of course, something had to happen that screwed up my birthday plans. My dumbass forgot when Easter was this year and originally planned to go that same Saturday. That wouldn't work at all since Easter sunday is a big deal with my family. If I missed it to go gambling they'd probably disown me, plus several people wouldn't be able to go because of it.
Good news, though...we've moved the weekend to May 13th now. That was the first next available weekend, which works for me. Plus now, we'll be celebrating my birthday as well as my cousins. So it will be even bigger than initially planned. I'M SO EXCITED!!! And I just can't wait!

My Birthday Celebration

My birthday is coming up in April and since last years birthday was less than even a mediocre time, I've decided that I'm taking things into my own hands and planning a huge blowout.
I've blocked two rooms, though I might have to book more, at the Resorts Hotel and Casino in Atlantic City for the Saturday before my birthday, my parents are getting us a party bus down and back as my present, and we're gonna party it up all night!!! I'm so excited and I just can't wait. I've got 8 people confirmed that are definitely going and several more that hopefully will come but have to wait until we get closer to determine if they can afford to go. Either way, I'm so excited. It's gonna be an awesome weekend and I know the next month and a half are gonna drag. AHHHHH!!!! I can't wait!

On a lighter note

I've realized that though I've only posted once, I'm headed down a road I don't want to go down. That first post almost set a tone that this blog was going to be a pity party I'm throwing for myself. I'm just here to remind myself that I need to focus on the good, and vent about the bad when I really need to.

More happy posts to follow...

Ever ask yourself why?

Did you ever ask yourself why bad things always seem to happen to good people? I ask myself that very question every single day. The biggest question I ask myself is why did my brother have to be the one that serves as the example to teenage drivers everywhere of what can happen when you're a new, inexperienced driver.
It's not fair that a 17 year old boy, in his prime, healthy, and with so much life left in front of him had to suffer such a tragic accident. It's not fair that he now lives life in a wheelchair, unable to walk, talk, and barely communicate with those around him. Everyone keeps telling me that he will heal in time but its been almost 4 years now and my hopes are dwindling that I will ever experience the things that a sister and brother should. I fear I'll never see him play sports again that he loved so much, be able to take him out for that first legal drink, see him graduate college, see him marry, never hold my niece or nephew in my arms, never grow old with him sharing our memories of childhood. It's just not fair...I miss him so much and feel so alone without him.
While I know we didn't have the most loving relationship growing up...in fact, we fought almost ever day with both words and our fists. We were quite mean to eachother but regardless, loved eachother very much....the way only siblings could.
I see my friends with their siblings and I'm jealous. Why can't that be me. I see them smiling and laughing together, having a good time. I hear them say how they haven't spoken in a while and complain about not getting that phone call to say happy birthday or congratulations when something good happens. I'm jealous and sometimes angry because I know that I will never get that phone call, never get a card on my birthday that says "Your brother, Aaron" like he always used to write. I just miss him so much and everyday something happens thats a daily reminder of what I've lost and what I will always feel is missing until the day when he is back home with us...should that day ever actually come.
So again, I ask, why do bad things always seem to happen to good people?